Men Can Stop Feeding on the Low Hanging Fruit

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We may be decent individuals but we are severely unaware of the hidden relationships that create the foundation of a life built upon male privilege.

In a world built upon patriarchal principles and misogynistic tendencies a man may want to consider abandoning his domestication and subsequent indoctrination when it comes to being raised within the industrial model of civilization. Once confronted with the fact that our living arrangement doesn’t solve problems but instead creates them, every conscionable man must face the choice of staying the course or embracing humility. Humility is rarely taught to men. Those who become familiar with it usually have had it forced upon them by life. Men must search for humility or perish while continuing a course of action that has no future.

Guilt for being a man is a waste of time. Facing what men have done and continue to do in the name of power, both personally and collectively, is a responsibility that requires hard work. Being loyal to your sex or gender, just because you were born or assigned to it, is misplaced and dysfunctional. Humility requires us to not only unravel our ingrained narrative but it also requires us to listen instead of always speaking and to follow instead of always wanting to lead. It requires us to become allies to those who our power oppresses, abuses, exploits, and destroys on a daily basis.

Usually at this point our collective script kicks in and quickly informs us that none of this applies to us because after all, as individuals we are good guys and we don’t oppress, abuse, exploit or destroy people by our daily actions. What this running explanation fails to tell us, is that patriarchy is systemic. We may be decent individuals but we are severely unaware of the hidden relationships that create the foundation of a life built upon male privilege. That’s how patriarchy works for men. It goes unnoticed by us so in turn we think it’s something that’s not really a problem. We then deny, blame or reject any notions that challenge the dominant male version of existence.

Being a good man demands exploration beyond the low hanging fruit we’ve been feeding on since birth.

Becoming allies isn’t what those with privilege do. If it was something we did there would be no privilege. When it comes to our inherent privilege, we love to point fingers and tell folks to take personal responsibility while ignoring our own. We do this by denying our privilege and we chalk everything up to our hard work. What’s missing from this story we tell ourselves about ourselves is the truth. The truth is, being born with a penis is to be given a membership card that many use when it’s beneficial but also deny its impact when it doesn’t seem convenient (a rarity) to be a male or a man. We want it both ways.

The actual hard work is becoming a traitor to our privilege. It’s the most difficult thing to do. If it were easy then the world would be a different place. If it were easy there would be no rape culture, no bathroom bills, no fear-based male aggression. It is our turn to take responsibility. Here is where we can begin:

Begin applying a radical feminist lens to the dominant narrative by listening to, reading and following the work of radical feminists.
Begin applying a transgender lens to the dominant narrative by listening to, reading and following the work of the transgender community.
Begin applying a non-industrial lens to the dominant narrative by listening to, reading and following the work of anti-civilization activists, indigenous peoples (worldwide) and anarchists.

Once one begins to go down this rabbit hole they will discover that there are conflicts, different points of view and no utopian solutions to the problems we currently face. Even the different lenses I mention above have conflicting points of view. Being a better man demands exploration beyond the low hanging fruit we’ve been feeding on since birth. It demands we evolve.